Sometimes Bombs Fall Quietly
by amaltheaz
Summary: Clint and Natasha are leaving for Tibet after the Battle of New York for a little R and R. But first, Clint has to make a stop to see an old friend. And Natasha makes a new one.
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note: Set after the events in The Avengers

* * *

They had been on the road for about half an hour, on their way to one of S.H.I.E.L.D's secret airfields when she noticed that Clint turned right when he should have gone left. They hadn't really uttered a word since they parted ways with the rest of the Avengers and really, that was always their way after a mission. They took their time to retreat inside themselves to deconstruct everything that had happened and what they needed to do to improve for the next time. Though Clint would usually at least say something to warn her if he was going to change course, he didn't say anything even after doing so and Natasha was beginning to wonder if maybe he was lost and didn't want to ask.

It wouldn't have been the first time.

"You do know how to get where we're supposed to go, right?"

He glanced back at her, his eyes narrowed into a mild glare because what exactly was she trying to insinuate?

"Remember the last time you couldn't find where we were going but you were too stubborn to tell me and then we wound up-"

"- arrested and locked up in a Bangkok prison. I remember, Tasha. I only got us lost one time. _One_ time!"

"Well, we're supposed to be making our way out of New York and this does not look like we're anywhere close to heading out."

"I am not _lost_. There's a stop that I have to make."

He didn't have to look at her to know exactly what expression was plastered on her face. It wasn't hard to picture those pursed full lips and that goddamn arching eyebrow. Natasha might be a master at deception but they had known each other long enough for him to be able to figure out exactly what she was thinking.

"And what, you expect me to hitchhike all the way to the airfield?"

"Don't be stupid. I would have gotten you a cab first."

Though he expected the punch on his arm, he always seemed to forget just how much Natasha could pack in them.

"We're _supposed_ to be laying low, genius."

Her reproach was light so he knew that she didn't mind too much that they were making a spontaneous detour. She had always been good at going with the flow.

Where they were going was most likely a bad idea and could be one of the stupidest things to do, especially right now, but he knew that this was something he had to do. He _needed_ to do it.

For Phil.

Sometime today, Audrey Nathan would be getting a call from Director Fury, letting her know.

Clint supposed that maybe Melinda could just find out for herself. Agent Phil Coulson was a highly respected Level 8 agent in S.H.I.E.L.D after all, and the grapevine would be buzzing with the news of his death. And he had no doubt that Fury would tell her himself. Plus, it would really also be the smarter thing to do. And it would hurt so much less.

But then again, he hadn't exactly always been one to do the smarter thing. Every decision he ever made was always based on his gut, his instinct. While some of them were not exactly the most brilliant of ideas and were just plain disasters; looking at Natasha, sometimes it worked out pretty damn well.

After everything that they had been through together with Phil. The missions, the pranks they pulled together and just, all the time they spent on and off the clock; it meant something to him. It had _always_ meant something to him. In their line of business, he hesitated to use the word too easily but he knew that he and Melinda were friends. He felt a harsh pinch of regret though because he had let that slide, at least where Melinda was concerned. After everything that went down in Bahrain she just seemed... So _different_. Not cold but just distant, to Phil and to him, by extension. Like she disappeared and her body was just an empty shell. He hated to think it but it was just so hard to look at her sometimes because he ached for the Melinda that she was before.

He tried to reach out to her a few times. Go out for drinks, maybe. A sparring session here and there. But after he brought Natasha in, their contact was minimal at best. Clint still heard things from Phil about how she was doing, about how she shouldn't be behind that desk, about how she was meant to be out there with them. It wasn't long after that Phil got busier and the last time that he asked, Phil couldn't really tell him anything.

"I was thinking of going to see Agent May."

Natasha didn't have to ask why. She had done her homework. She had read the post-mission reports where the three agents had worked together. Phil and Clint even sometimes used to talk about the things that happened during missions with Melinda. It wasn't difficult to miss the fondness that both men had for the former field agent. It was a feeling that obviously never went away with time.

The first time Natasha ever heard of Agent Melinda May, also known as The Cavalry, she was still somewhat new to S.H.I.E.L.D. Maybe nearly a year since Clint had brought her in but still new enough that she had so much to learn. There wasn't much she could find out about why Agent May was given such a moniker outside of the regular gossip that ran pretty wild in the agency. She could only gather that it had something to do with Bahrain and even then Natasha was only able to get the bare bones of that particular story.

In the end, she knew that the only way she could get the real story was to go to the source herself. But Natasha wasn't that desperate to know about why "The Cavalry".

But she sure wanted to know more about who the person is behind that name.

"I'm going with you."

Clint didn't bother telling her that she didn't have to come; that it wasn't her problem. But he knew her better. He knew her best, even. So he didn't bother telling her no, and just pressed harder on the gas pedal.


	2. Chapter 2

**2**.

Of all the people she expected to have standing at her front door, Clint Barton and Natasha Romanoff were nowhere near the top of that list. It was so unexpected that Melinda had to take a short second to recollect herself, many questions quickly buzzing around in her head. Then she heard her mother's voice saying how rude she was being, making her guests stand outside for so long, being a bad host. Now _that_ was one voice she never could keep silent, no matter how old she got.

Melinda took a quick scan of the area outside her front door.

Finding nothing out of the ordinary, she ushered both of them inside before taking a good look at her surprise visitors. She had seen the news footage of all that happened in New York after the battle with Loki and the Chitauri the day before, all the carnage and destruction that was left behind. They didn't even look like they had been through a battle at all though. They actually looked more like they were headed somewhere and she highly doubted that 'somewhere' was her house.

Directing her gaze to one of her oldest friends, Melinda couldn't really say how long it had been since she and Clint were in proximity of each other but she knew that it had been a really long time. Phil usually brought whatever paperwork that Clint and Agent Romanoff submitted to him beforehand. This practice didn't last for very long though and Melinda understood this. She understood that he hardly had any downtime and that Director Fury kept him so busy that he could barely come see her for even a minute.

But she still felt that sharp pang in her chest that struck her as soon as she laid her eyes on her former partner. He looked older obviously and that furrow between his eyebrows looked more prominent than it ever did before. But his light eyes and his charmingly lopsided grin; they were all still the same and she realized just how much she missed her friend.

"Wasn't your plan Newark to Guam?"

Knowing that the question was addressed to him, he scratched the back of his neck, grinning crookedly at the reminder of a conversation they once had, about what they would do if they had to disappear completely off the grid. Actually, it was more that he went on and on about what he would do while she just went through her paperwork. It shouldn't have surprised him though that she remembered his elaborately thought-out ramblings of all the things he would do to lose everybody and anybody trying to track him. Before meeting Natasha, she had always been the one that listened to him when nobody else seemed to want to do so.

He shrugged. "Plans change."

She smirked knowingly. "Oh, I see. You got lost again, didn't you?"

"Hey, that was _one_ time," he sputtered defensively.

"One time that resulted in having me explaining to Director Fury why we were flying from Tunis instead of _Tripoli_."

His eyes rolled at the reminder. "Whatever," he muttered. "It's not like we were that far off. Sort of."

He didn't need to look at Natasha to know how incredibly amused she was by this and it gave him pause about having the two women occupying the same space together. The thought of the two of them working together and really, just seeing the sneaky, conspiring way that they looked at each other sent chills down his spine. Though he did wonder now whether they already knew each other. He definitely had never spent time with the two of them together, especially since Natasha had always given both their field reports to Phil so there was no way the two had crossed paths before. The way they looked at each other was filled more with curiosity rather than wariness or suspicion though, so he supposed that was his answer.

Melinda filled the silence between them and extended her hand towards her. "I'm Melinda. Great job in New York."

All that she had known of the infamous Black Widow were the details that were in the her S.H.I.E.L.D profile, which included all the post-mission reports that Melinda herself had personally read through. Agent Romanoff was efficient at her job and that no matter what interruption came their way, she kept on task until the mission was completed. Melinda learned a lot about the agent this way and admired her for all that she had done for S.H.I.E.L.D. But aside from that, she had no real or personal opinion of her.

Not yet anyway.

She quickly took the other woman's hand in a firm grip, shaking it once. "Natasha. Thanks."

"Hey I was there too, y'know?"

They both shared a smirk, rolled their eyes as they ignored him at the same time.

"I'm guessing you two need a place to stay for the night?"

"Melinda, we're actually here because… We have news. About Phil."

* * *

Working as an agent - especially a field agent - for a secret organization like S.H.I.E.L.D or with any other law enforcement bodies really, you get to learn pretty quickly that putting your life on the line pretty much came as part and parcel of the job. It was, as they said, an 'occupational hazard'. It was dismissive and made them all seem expendable, but this was the job and it was everything she had known and understood for more than half her life now.

And even though she knew and understood this, and had been prepared for this day to come, she was not at all prepared for the devastation that shook her bones at hearing about Phil's death.

Melinda wasn't sure how long he stood there at the bottom of the steps, just watching her. Time seemed so irrelevant after Clint broke the news to her. She had been doing her laundry before she heard the sound of her door-bell. Who could have ever thought that this was how her day would end? With two of S.H.I.E.L.D's best agents, one of whom happened to be her former partner, coming personally to tell her that somebody they worked with before was dead. Somebody she had known since she first joined the Academy. Somebody she thought of as close to family.

She was set on not being the first to break the silence and Clint had never been able to keep quiet for very long anyway. Unless it was for a mission, he could never keep quiet for too long. For now, the only sounds in that room were the ones of her bare fists making contact with the punching bag hanging from the ceiling and her own heavy breathing. There had been no time to tape her hands. Rage bubbled so violently in her chest that she thought she could scream.

Phil was _dead_.

So many thoughts raced each other inside her head. She should have been there was the foremost. Maybe she could have saved him. Sure, she had been nowhere near the scene and she had just been sitting at her desk with her colleagues, watching but still, she could have done _something_. Anything as long as it meant that Phil would still be alive. She didn't even care that it had been so long since he had come to see her at her desk. Melinda could barely remember the last time he even stopped to just say hello to her anymore.

Melinda cursed Phil's name, knowing that he died doing what he felt was the right thing to do. It was just like him to want to go and deal with the threat himself. He had always been so goddamn idealistic, wanting to save the world. She couldn't get angry with him about _that_. It was one of the things she admired so much about him.

But it didn't make him any less of an idiot for doing it in the first place.

Her only little piece of comfort was in the fact that Phil hadn't been alone when it happened.

_"Did he- was he-?"_

_She didn't have to finish what she was going to say. She couldn't. But Clint knew. He hadn't forgotten who she was and what she was like. He couldn't count the number of times he saw her stay with somebody clinging to the fraying tethers of their life, just so they wouldn't be alone in their last few moments. He never understood it at first. The people that worked with them knew what they were getting into; they knew the risks that they might get left behind and they might not live by the end of the mission. But this was who Melinda was. She protected people to the very end._

_"No. He wasn't alone. Nick was with him."_

Clint sighed quietly, his eyes following Melinda's every move. After he and Natasha explained to her what they knew of what happened, she stood so abruptly and walked away in a rush. Natasha had turned to him with a puzzled expression on her face and he only shrugged helplessly before getting up to follow his old friend. His hunch had been right when he found her in her basement gym.

He knew that he just needed to wait it out. Wait until she worked out all the anger inside her, until she came to the same conclusion that he did; that even if she had been there, there was nothing she could have done to stop Phil from trying to be a hero.

Despite all the time apart, they all still knew each other just a little too well.

It was only when he noticed her starting to slow down, the initial rage leaving her body until she was finally only standing still in the middle of the room; it was only then when he made his move towards her. Clint grabbed the tape before wrapping them around her shaking hands. She wasn't going to talk yet. She wasn't ready to talk yet. So he began taping his own hands, knowing that she was watching him closely before taking her hand and leading her towards the matted area.

He might as well give her a moving target to work with for now.


End file.
